I once had several interesting discussions with a wise man some years ago...and I wasn't talking to myself. We discussed many topics during our conversations such as family drama, growing up, important decisions we all face in life, regrets...etc. Of all the things we talked about one topic, and one thing this man said to me, has really helped me enjoy aspects of my life that I had not previously. I would like to share parts of our conversation and the three key words he said to me that changed my life for the positive. I hope it helps you as much as it has helped me.
At some point in our many conversations we began discussing aspects of my personality, specifically things I previously referred to as pet peeves. The man I was speaking with called them quality of life destroyers! There is a huge difference in those two statements, so allow me to explain his reasoning. For as long as I can remember I've hated certain types of change. I intend to devote an upcoming blog on my life's struggle with dealing with change and what I feel is its origins, but for now just know that there was and continues to be some forms of change I'm simply not comfortable with. I feel I do my best and am most content when I have structured routines and habits. Things that disrupt my habits and daily routines used to really annoy me. Though I'm far from cured thanks to the 3 magic words I promised to share with you I have learned to deal much better with not only change, but life in general.
I hope at this point you just asked yourself, "So what are the 3 magic words!?". I can't reveal them yet, but rest assured they are not far away. For now here's 2 words for you, "keep reading". When asked for an example of how and/or why change bothers me I brought up the issue of travel. I love visiting new places, trying new foods, and learning about various cultures, but with that said I must also confess that before hearing and absorbing the 3 magic words I absolutely hated, dreaded, despised, and loathed the actual process of travel itself. From long drives in the car, waiting in never ending lines, traffic, packing and unpacking, and any of the other multitude of obstacles that come with flying. After hearing this the man replied, "How can you say you love travel when you hate doing all the things you just mentioned?". My reply was "Well...once I get there I'm great. I just hate getting there". Just as I rewrote those words I realize what a complete idiot I must have sounded like. I realize now that what I really disliked was how the act of traveling disrupted the habits and routines that I thrive in. Once at the destination I could unpack and fall back into my habits and routines.
The remainder of this post is a paraphrase of what he then said to me along with the 3 magic words. We each only get one shot at life. One of the very few things we actually have control over throughout our life times are the choices we each make. Our lives are made up of choices. We can choose to be miserable or happy. We can choose to be mean or nice. We can choose to turn left or right. You get the picture. The point is the one life that we're each given goes by so very fast, and so many of us choose to look at the negative instead of the positive. I used to look at nothing but the negative aspects of traveling, just as many of you out there may only look at the negatives of something in your own life. Instead of always thinking about the negative try this...choose to just... "enjoy the journey."
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