"I got stuff to do!"

Here is yet another in my somewhat continuous installment of encounters with students that leave me scratching my head and saying, "uhhh...". A few weeks ago I had the thrill to tutor a student at a local learning center I've been working at part time for about 4 years. Upon entering the center and walking to my table I realized this was a student I had tutored for a couple of weeks when I first started. The young man I remember from 4 years ago was polite, intelligent, and a hardworker. Well...time certainly changed things.

Here is how the hour began, and please note that I'm writing this as close to word for word as possible.

ME: Hey, how are you today?

STUDENT: I don't know.

ME: What school do you go to?

STUDENT: I don't know.

ME: What's your favorite subject?

STUDENT: I don't know.

ME: What's your least favorite subject?

STUDENT: Math.

ME: Oh yeah...why is that?

STUDENT: Cause I get A's.

At this point my confusion begins, and by the end of the hour I would be left trying to figure out what the heck had just happened. After giving the student his first assignment the conversation continued,

ME: Do you understand what to do?

STUDENT: I don't know.

After a few minutes had passed...

ME: Do you need some help?

STUDENT: I don't know.

Once he had completed the assignment, he looks to me and says the following,

STUDENT: I'm done...this is 4th grade work. It's too easy for me.

ME: oh yeah.

The young man was absolutely correct in saying that the work was easy, and in fact it was 3rd grade work. However, after checking his work he got every single problem wrong !

This type of thing continued throughout the remainder of our time together, but there was one more incident of insane hilarity that occurred about 37 minutes in...

STUDENT: You owe me a thousand dollars.

ME: What? Why?

STUDENT: Cause you taught me how to do that.

Again, I'm left scratching my head as to what in the world he is talking about. The next thing to happen 2 minutes later put the icing on the cake.

STUDENT: I need to use the bathroom.

ME: OK...go ahead.

STUDENT: (screaming out loud as he is walking across the center to the restroom) I GOT STUFF TO DO!!

Of course all heads in the center turn to the young man who proceeds into the restroom totally unaware he has garnered the attention of everyone. He then spent the next 3-4 minutes in the restroom screaming a litany of unintelligible words.