Two Broken Hands

My original intent for tonight's blog was going to be about the severe anxiety I've been wrecked with all day today thinking about how my student's are going to perform on the reading EOG tomorrow. I hope that I am wearing a thong all next week...over my pants of course! No one on planet earth wants to see what 1st crossed your minds when you read the last sentence. I promised all my students that if 90% of the class scored a 3 or 4 on their 1st attempt on the reading EOG that I would wear a pair of thongs all week. Anyway...I decided that instead of rambling about EOG's tonight I would try to lighten the mood for your sake and mine by sharing the story of grandpa's two broken hands.

Around the middle of last week in social studies class we were discussing how laws are more strictly enforced in other parts of the world like cutting off hands for stealing in parts of the Middle East, caning in Singapore...etc. Well, for whatever reason the discussion triggered a thought in one of my student's minds. He raised his hand and the following conversation transpired...

Me: Yes

Student: My grandpa broke both his hands last week.

Me: (after a 10 - 15 seconds of staring at him trying to figure out where this was going) That
sucks...how did he do that?

Student: He's a big guy, and he was falling so he put his hands out to protect himself and they
broke.

Me: Sorry to hear that.

At this point I returned my attention to the overhead and was a heartbeat from continuing with the class lecture when he blurts out the following.

Student: He can't wipe his butt Mr. Styron!

Of course the class broke into hysterics, and another student yelled out, "Well what does he do then?" With one of the saddest looks I've ever seen cross a student's face he replied...

My grandma has to do it.

To all my faithful followers here's hoping your days are better than that student's grandmother!